[setfeatureimage img=’2012/06/EmptyChair.jpg’][setmeta name=”title”]Gay Couples where only one partner has ‘the problem’ «Case Example»[/setmeta][setmeta name=”description”]What happens when a couple who believe only one of them has the relationship problem come into couple counselling[/setmeta]This kind of couple case can struggle to go beyond the initial assessment sessions. Partner A believes that the couple did not want counselling and so he does not engage well in the process. Partner B believes the relationship is in trouble & wants outside help. Partner A agrees to come to a few sessions as if he is supporting his partner but is reluctant to participate – or even adamant that he will not participate – in any helpful or revealing way.
Couple counselling is not about meeting in therapy with two people’s needs – it’s about counselling a single relationship.
If it takes two people to make a relationship, and one of those people is not participating in the process, then what are we trying to do engaging in couple counselling?
In the case of having separate agendas, a couple may not (or will not) be able to agree on the focus for couple counselling. Without an agreed focus couple counselling is unsuccessful.
Sometimes working with a couple to see if we can find an agreed focus may be helpful – at least to reveal to the couple some of their relationship behaviours that make agreements and negotiations difficult.
However, when one partner does not want to make or participate in relationship changes (it’s the other partner who has a problem, not me) then relationship counselling can struggle and ultimately fail.Contact Dean today…